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How many people do you know who do not have an ID, a rent receipt or?

I dont QUITE qualify: I have utility bills, a deed to my house, two books with my purty pic on the About the Author page, a birth certificate, two expired passports, college diploma, high school yearbook, again with my purty pic, from the 60s and a kindergarten class pic from the 50s but the local Rite Aid Drugstore wont sell me a pack of cigarettes because I dont have proper current government picture ID proving Im over 18 (or, now, 21). And thats despite the fact that theyve been selling me DRUGS for roughly 30 years! MJM, who may, or may not, actually exist! (Be careful dont blink or I may just disappear! See my pic here:

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